Monday, August 13, 2012

A negative book review


Dear  Sir,
"I have read your climate novel and it is one
of the worst books I've come
across this year. As you typed in your email to me, with a question mark, perhaps a typo, but there never the less, -- "the book is
IMPORTANT?" -- I agree wholeheartedly sir, with that question mark.!!!!



Your characters are one-dimensional, the dialogue is stilted and often
unintentionally hilarious, the situations are merely a series of cliches
derived from any number of other "end of the world" stories. There is
little about the book that appears to be truly original, or is presented
with any sort of literary skill beyond the most rudimentary -- the book's "Prologue" is so ham-fisted and clumsy that it's almost funny.



I understand your personal stake in this book, as you are deeply invested it seems in the "ideas" in it. But that is all that it is

-- a single vague idea, and not a terribly original nor a very carefully

considered at that, about a single eventuality that might be

extrapolated from the science and speculation that surrounds the topic

of global climate change, that has been churned into a slapdash series

of anecdotes about uninteresting characters and there unimaginative

adventures.



Perhaps there is a decent work of fiction that could be crafted from

this little idea of yours. And if you and your publisher (and editor, if you even HAD one!) are pleased with

the results of your efforts in  writing a novel that nobody will read, then, really,

that's all that matters.''



END OF REVIEW by a mean and cruel and insenstive US newspaper book reviewer

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Part 2



"I have read your climate novel and it is one
of the worst books I've come
across this year.
The characters are one-dimensional, the dialogue is stilted and often
[unintentionally] hilarious, the situations are merely a series of cliches derived from any number of other "end of the world" stories. There is
little about the book that appears to be truly original, or is presented with any sort of literary skill beyond the most rudimentary -- the book's "prologue" rant is so ham-fisted and clumsy that it's almost funny.
I understand your personal stake in this book, as you are deeply invested it seems in the "ideas" in it. But that is all that it is
-- a single vague idea, and not a terribly original nor a very carefully considered at that, about a single eventuality that might be extrapolated from the science and speculation that surrounds the topic of global climate change, that has been churned into a slapdash series of anecdotes about uninteresting characters and there unimaginative
adventures.
Perhaps there is a decent work of fiction that could be crafted from
this little idea of yours. And if you and your publisher (and editor, if you even HAD one!) are pleased with
the results of your efforts in writing a novel, then, and releasing it to the world, then, really,
that's all that matters.''

Anonymous said...

not bad... Jeremiah had it worse than you remember? but he was warned

Anonymous said...

That man's ments incidentally refer to a surprising number of speculative fictional works about the future.''
danbloom
August 14, 2012 07:08 AMA friend in SCotland who is himself a sci fi novelist tells me re that review above: "God, that is unnecessarily brutal. If the person thought that, fine, but anyone with an ounce of tact would keep such an opinion to themselves and not say it to the person who CREATED the damned thing! Or the person who acted as the producer of the book!"

[Ed note, I did not write the book in question, I produced it, commissioned it, packaged it. i am of course NOT sharing that "review" with the actual author. It would break his heart. But for me, it's instructive, sure.]
danbloom
August 14, 2012 07:10 AMA top technology and digital revolution writer tells me re the "review" above:

Dear Danny, All I needed to see was this: " As you typed in your email to me....."


danny, This person is coming out of the distant past. "typed"? Of course a book about the future isn't for them. ''
danbloom
August 14, 2012 07:11 AM"this little idea of yours"
Oh yeah, after that came out of anyone's mouth, I'd quit listening to them. What a fool that pompous prick is.
Then again, I wonder if he accidentally hit send? It happens. I've written letters (and received them) that were either for a different party or never meant to leave the screen of the writer. oops.
hyblaean- Julie
August 14, 2012 07:25 AMAnyone who has had a bad review knows how traumatic is it, but reviewers don’t know everything. Here are what some reviewers have said in the past.

"Sentimental rubbish... Show me one page that contains an idea"-- Odessa Courier on Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy, 1877.

"Shakespeare's name, you may depend on it, stands absurdly too high and will go down"-- Lord Byron, 1814.

"His fame is gone out like a candle in a snuff and his memory will always stink" -- Wm. Winstanley, 1687 on Milton.

"Monsieur Flaubert is not a writer" -- La Figaro, 1857.

"This is a book of the season only"-- NY Herald Tribune on The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald.

"We do not believe in the permanence of his reputation... our children will wonder what their ancestors could have meant by putting Dickens at the head of the novelists of today."-- Saturday Review, 1858.

"Nothing odd will do long. Tristam Shandy did not last" -- Samuel Johnson in 1776 on a novel that is still in print over 200 years later.

"The only consolation which we have in reflecting upon it is that it will never be generally read